Audio & Video/SNL

[SNL] Jim Carrey - Jimmy Tango's Fatbusters

cousteau 2006. 8. 18. 11:14
 Jimmy Tango's Fat Busters    

Jimmy Tango / Jim Carrey 
Male Audience Member / Fred Wolf 
Female Client / Nancy Walls 
Male Client / Will Ferrell


SNL - 1996/05/18
 

Jimmy Tango: Hi! Do you recognize this tub of crap?  That's me, three-and-a-half weeks ago! Since then, I've lost 155 pounds!

Yes, you heard me right! I lost 155 pounds in less than three weeks! How did I lose all that gross fat? By combining the miracle of technology with ordinary street junkies! Producing this: Jimmy Tango's Fat Busters! It's this simple: wear my patented vibrating heat-bead suit, then jam an unbelievable amount of pure, raw crystal meth into your system! You might ask, "Isn't crystal meth illegal?" You bet! But my scientist, Dr. Cody, spends his days in a tin shed deep inside a small canyon outside San Bernadino, constantly altering the scientific formula of a bathtub crank that keeps us one step ahead the law, and keeps you one step ahead of the fat farm! Fatties, here's my promise: wear my vibrating heat beads, while blasting down handfuls of crrystal meth, and you'll drop weight so fast you'll lose your mind! Any questions? You!

Male Audience Member: Jimmy, I like what I hear, but even though I'm not a doctor, it sounds unhealthy. Does the kind of dramatic weight loss you describe have any side effects? 

Jimmy TangoYou betcha! In my case, when I close my eyes, all I see are spiders and snails! My skin is clammy! My mouth is very dry! I think of suicide nonstop! And five minutes ago, I vomited the strangest colors into my stage manager's fanny pack! But you know what? The main side effect is, these days when I'm wearing a blue suit, and I yawn, people don't try to stuff a letter into my mouth! Get off!! Folks, if you're serious about weight loss, then you shouldn't be afraid to.. "Ride The Snake!" Now! Let's talk to some of my clients!  Hi, Olive Oyl! Have you always been so thin, hmm?? 

Female Client: No! I used to be a 220-pound land monster! And, in eight days, by "Riding The Snake"...I lost 124 pounds! I've never had a date in my life, but two days ago, I made out with Scott Baio at a party! Jimmy, by using your method, I really lost weight fast! Probably too fast! The stress you put on my body made me slip into the bowels of a red nightmare! I sleep in my oven! My hair falls out in clumps! I cry when I see a tree! And I burn symbols into my housepets with a curling iron! But it's worth it, because, these days, when I'm wearing a black jumpsuit, I look like a closed umbrella! Thank you, Jimmy! 

Jimmy Tango: Hey, welcome to the club, Sliver! Start liking it! I lost 180 pounds in five days, and I'm.. ecstatic!  Let's hear from someone else! You-ou-ou-ou! 

Male Client:  I'm taking those speed pills of yours, and I'm wearing the vibrating heat beads, and by "Riding your Snake", not only have I lost 65 pounds in four days, but guess what? I found out I'm the Devil! And I will wash over the Earth, and the seas will run red with all the blood of all its sinners! I am reborn! And I've got YOU to thank, Jimmy Tango! 

Jimmy Tango: Sounds good! But talk is cheap! Scan me! 

Male ClientAaagghhh!! Make it stop! Make it STOP, Jimmy!! Aaagghhhh!! 

Jimmy Tango: Nice try, novice! But don't mess with the maestro! So, there you have it, folks! Use Jimmy Tango's method, and within days you'll drop more weight than a Tijuana crack whore! Hey! If you're a porky puke, don't be afraid! Come "Ride The Snake!"  And you'll lose fat quick! If you dare! 

맹목적으로 TV home shopping 광고에 빠져사는 이들을 경각심을 불러 일으키는 skit.
 Jim Carrey는 역시 타고난 comedian.